… Well. The past week has been nothing short of shitty for me. I guess I’ll start with what’s happened recently…

I needed to go shopping to pick up some stuff, so I asked my mom if she wanted to come along. She wants to invite my annoying brat of a younger sister. Fine. Whatever. She wants to take her time and go 3 hours later. Fine. She wants to yell at my dog for jumping onto the bed. Fine. I’m getting a headache for lack of sleep. Fine. I head to a shower and she asks me where I’m going. Fine. My younger sister says I’m going out with my friends and gets my mother asking why I didn’t ask her for permission. … Fine. I head to the bus stop to take the bus, and then realise that my wallet disappeared along the way. Fi- Wait, what?!

… To put it simply, I lost my wallet. We head back to the house to look for it and my mother suggests searching my schoolbag about 5 times. Then she suggests looking for it in my bag about 8 or so times. I decide to head back to look for it… in case it dropped on the ground somewhere and someone picks it up. But we have to wait for her because she managed the incredible feat of pulling a drawer off the rails and is struggling to put it back in. By the time we reach there, the wallet’s gone… And note that I intended to go shopping for shoes, presents and all that jazz, so that’s about $300 gone along with my student pass cum EZ-link card, my library card, some neoprints and about everything else that was inside there.

My dog, Jackie, has been coughing badly recently too. I got pissed off at being woken up every night by him coughing, since my parents NEVER get out of their beds to check on the dogs even when they’re barking like crazy. … And they never get out of their beds to check the power breaker when the power trips and their air-conditioning goes off, it’s always up to us… Anyway, we made a trip down to the vet. A trip that apparently didn’t needed to be made according to my father, but whatever, the damn dog’s important to me. The vet checks him over with a stethoscope and then asks a few questions like how long he has been coughing for. … Then she gives us a diagnosis.

He has a heart condition. His heart is failing and on a scale of about 1-6 for how serious it is, Jackie ranks at about 4-5. He was coughing because his lungs were filling with liquid thanks to his heart not being able to pump enough blood. She says that once diagnosed at that late a stage, most dogs live about 6 months more, maybe a bit more if we’re lucky. Even with the medication that he’s taking now to help him, there’s the chance that he could have a heart attack any moment and die.

I admit… I went into shock. I’ve had Jackie since I was about four or five and he was the same age as I was. He grew up with me from the playful young dog that he was then into the old but still lovable dog that he is today. He got a blood test and an x-ray as well, to make a better diagnosis of the condition, though it was not that much of a comfort that he did not have heartworm. The irony can suck at times… the vet said that he had a heart that was larger than usual. I guess it wasn’t enough to keep him going until the end. I cried. I fucking cried and if you know me, I almost never cry unless I’m pissed off. … I figure I should end my post right about here…
Oh, and here are some paraphrased quotes.

“Stop feeding the dogs crackers.”
“Why? He’s going to die soon, anyway.”

The lovely last quote is from my father, who is truly a sensitive and caring man who goes out of his way to provide for his family.

So… yep, I’ve been a bitch lately, I’m pissed, I’ve been jumping from one end of the emotional spectrum to the other, I’m paranoid and I’m so –SICK- of being stuck at home. I can’t find a good place to write, my assigned ‘desk’ is covered in things that are sure as hell not mine and the moment I open the curtains to get some light, I get yelled at to close them. People are acting like they know me and I swear, if I have to deal with another Twitard, they’re about to see me get very, very violent. Yeah, I have no way to blow all of this pent-up emotion off and it is taking me apart bit by bit. School’s going to start soon. … Like I care. My aunt says the weather in New York is cloudy and dark, just like in Twilight. … Because I totally love Twilight and I am in love with Robert “Edward Cullen” Pattinson. If you actually believe what I said in that previous sentence, I suggest you stab yourself in the neck and then burn yourself to ashes with sunlight because stupidity of that level is intolerable.

Yay.